I Miss Before

I miss running out the door with keys, wallet and two kids in tow

I miss when it was only irritating to forget my phone

I miss carefree slumber

I miss staying up late to finish a good book

I miss sending the girls to sleepovers with no worries

I miss not having to explain

I miss when the biggest worry about school was if someone was going to be mean to my girls

I miss rarely going to the doctor

I miss using my vacation days for whatever I want

I miss not categorizing a photograph as before or after

I miss the the occasional (what I now know to be) quite mind

I miss when the main focus on sick days was if they could make it to the toilet in time

I miss watching the girls run and play and not seeing a dropping blood sugar

I miss an extra $300 a month

I miss feeling only mommy guilt when separated from the girls

I miss seeing a certain innocence in their eyes

I miss seeing beautiful young skin without site spots

I miss when days and days could pass with no pain inflicted on my girls

I miss thinking about the girls' futures with only curious wonder

Today I miss Before